Wonderlust
by darlingblue
Summary: Suddenly I saw myself falling inside a deep hole, one that sucked everything out of my soul. I could only breathe her. Her hair, her lips, her eyes; I fell inside them and got lost in this land of lust. I've always known that Jade West could steal things. But I never knew she would steal my heart too.
1. Chapter 1

Where do I go when sleep doesn't fix me? There's a knot living in my throat that wants to get out. Infinite possibilities. The infinite is the limit. And I'm part of it. Infinite universes, me, infinite. What isn't done by me here, is getting done somewhere else. I know that. And that thought comforts me. Somewhere, among infinite others, I am yours. You want me and I want you; I crave you and save you in this obscure eternity filled with love. I'll be yours forever. Maybe you're different there. Maybe you crave me too. Maybe, just maybe, that version of ourselves don't care what others might think. Maybe you don't hate me there. Do you love me there? Infinite possibilities, coins to be soon thrown. And in every road, I drive. In every curve, I turn. Every sound, I hear. Every wave, I dive. And I reach out to you.

There are infinite paths and knots in my chest. Some of them I can easily undo. Others stay. The knot I have is from love. Physical, emotional, painful love. I love the pain you bring me. I also love the sky when it reminds me of you. Cloudy, dark, cold, confusing. Mind blowing. Maybe someday you'll find yourself in my chest. There's enough room inside. I'll even allow you to leave. Just please, leave the rope there, tight on my throat, so I can remember us, everything we are, could be. Everything we are not.

When did all this mess start, you wonder.

I ask myself the same question.

I can't put a finger when it all started, it seems so long ago.

Maybe it was always there.

This craving.

This lust.

This mess.

This love.

I wonder when it started.

I wonder when my world got turned upside down.

I wonder when I fell madly in love with Jade West.


	2. Chapter 2

A hot morning in Hollywood. Another ordinary day about to begin.

I wake up at six in the morning, as usual, get dressed, put on a purple tank top and some skinny jeans. Trina is taking me to school, since I don't have my licence yet. It sucks to have her drive me. She's always late, and complaining about every single thing she dislikes. She's also a terrible driver.

We get to school, and I run to my looker, since the bell's about to ring. I grab my books while mumbling a song we were listening to on the radio.

"Hey Tori! How are you in this fine morning? Really hot isn't it? Oh, I love it when it's hot. One time, my brother told me it was so hot his skin started melting. Do you think skins can melt Tori? I'm kinda worried. You know-"

"Cat! Hi! No, I don't think skins can melt." I give her a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, you'll be just fine."

Cat Valentine. The most bubbly, crazy energized girl I've ever met. She sighs, relieved that her skin will not melt from the heat. I wonder sometimes if she really is as innocent as she seems to be. I get the feeling she isn't.

"Oh, hey Jade! Tori just told me skins can't melt from the heat. What do you think?"

Jade.

My train of thought is suddenly disturbed by the mention of that name. My breathing gets stuck in my lungs, probably resenting the presence of the scary, pale goth.

I turn my head away from my locker, and there she is. The devil herself. She's standing in front of Cat with the most bored look she could master, rolling her eyes. I take a few moments just to watch her. Her black hair is curled at the edges, as usual, with some dark blue strings in it. She's wearing black boots, tight, very tight dark jeans and a black top that shows a little too much cleavage. I instantly advert my eyes, scared of getting caught staring. That would be weird, and Jade would not like it. But damn, she looks kinda hot in those clothes. Scaring, as usual, but pretty.

I realize I shouldn't be thinking so highly of a girl who hates my guts, but it's not like I can help it. Everyone in their right minds can tell how pretty Jade is.

"I think you should stop boring me with nonsense so early in the morning and go get me some coffee." Jade says, with a bored tone.

Cat, used to those remarks from the goth, smiles and with a "kay kay" runs out to the cafeteria to get the devil some coffee.

Suddenly her face turns to me, who's been watching her the whole time.

Her intense, angry stare, catches me off guard, her eyes holding mine with such intensity that I feel my heart flip a little. Wow, I'm really scared of her.

"Quit the staring Vega. I'd like to keep my breakfast at my stomach, thank you." And with that, she storms off to class, not even bothering to look back.

I can't help also the disappointment that invades my insides. That girl is just so frustrating. She makes a point of saying nearly every day how much she dislikes me, even hates me. I don't know what I did to deserve that kind of treatment. All I ever wanted was for us to be friends. I guess I'm never gonna get that.

People always bug me about it. They want to know why, even with all the bickering and constant insults she directs towards me, I still insist on being her friend. I can't really tell why. I just know that my mind constantly flutters towards her, like she's this intense magnet that attracts everything and everyone, sucking them inside this bowl of fear mixed with admiration. I don't hate her like she claims to hate me. But I am, indeed, scared of her. That girl is just so intimidating, and also so intense. She can suck all the air out of you just by staring. And that is, I admit, frightening.

Lost in my thoughts about Jade, I find myself already entering Sikowit's class, taking a seat on the front row, near Andre.

"So! Now that every human being is inside, let's get this party started. Torey, Jadey, up here, now." Our crazy thing that calls himself a teacher orders, and I do as he says.

Jade, with a groan, gets up and stands besides me, staring at the floor like it's the most interesting thing in the world.

"You guys are astronauts, also you're lovers. You've lost control of your space ship and are about to die in a crash! Action!"

I frown immediately, so does Jade, but hers is more murder looking.

"NO way I'm-" Jade begins, with her deep, angry voice, getting interrupted right away.

"No complaining also, Miss Jade, stop being a gank, now go! And action!"

We both look at each other. And there goes my heart again, threatening to break out of my ribcage, while my stomach does a little flip. Why does she have such an effect on me? Although, maybe that girl has that effect on everyone. Her murderous looks can probably scare even the most bad ass on earth.

I watch the way she eyes me. Her green eyes have that kind of determined sparkle that I've always admired of. But somewhere, in between those green orbs, I see something.

I see a different kind of glow. Maybe it's the room's light, or something. But I still see it. It's somehow, a twist. It's shines confusion, hatred, or maybe, it's something else. I can't put a finger on it, but her eyes give away a deep struggle.

An internal battle, between her body and her eyes. They betray her. They reach out to the depths of her soul, catching a lost, lonely little girl, and portray it, for everyone who would look closely enough. They unsettle me from head to toe. I can't help, but wonder: do my eyes betray me too?

And, as quickly as it appeared, it was gone. It got lost between the orbs, diving in between that green sea, and melting right into the black hole in the middle.

And right at that moment I knew.

She's hiding herself.

What is she hiding?


	3. Chapter 3

"Oh my dear god, I lost control of the ship." She quickly slips into the acting exercice, as I realize I should have done, instead of watching her like an idiot. She looks down to the ground, sadness and fear coloring her pale figure, nearly in tears. Wow. That girl can act. She catches my eye and takes a step forward, making the storm inside of me go wild. "We're gonna hit that asteroid. It's the end now."

"Wha- Oh my god. No no no, this can't be true. It's not the end, we can get out of this. I know we can. You can do anything, please just tell me we can get out. Please honey." I say, desperate, nearly in tears also, taking another step closer to her.

I can't help it. Like a magnet she pulls me towards her, and my instinct tells me to comfort her. Then I remind myself: she's acting. But damn, that girl is a hell of an actress.

Again, up close, I see that something flick in her eyes. I don't know what it is, but it cuts deep inside my skin. It takes my breath away.

She's beautiful.

"I CAN'T! You know I can't! It's too late. It's over for us. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten you into this mess, babe." Her face contorts in pain, as she takes another step towards me, this time, doing the unexpected. She takes my hand in hers, softly, her pale and soft, oh so soft fingers gently carressing the back of my hand.

And that simple gesture, that simple touch, burns me. And the fire spreads, from my hands, to my arm, to my lungs, to the tip of my toes.

And just like that, I'm on fire.

Does she feel that too?

I'm intoxicated with Jade from head to toe. And the air in the room is suddenly not enough. I gasp for air, desperation showing in my face. They'll think I'm just acting.

And I look at her. Somehow, that something in her eyes consume her. And she's glowing all over, irradiating heat from those green orbs.

"It's not your fault. I agreed on doing this too. Don't blame yourself. Death is coming, I know, but we should just embrace it. It's bound to come anytime, for everyone." I grip her hand tighter, seeing hope flash across her eyelids. And I can't help the phrase that comes out of my mouth next.

"I'm glad my time came with you."

She sighs, biting softly on her lower lip, and I trail my eyes to her lips for a moment. The fire from my hand explodes inside my stomach, and I feel like I'm gonna pass out from the need of oxigen.

"And..CUT!"

Sikowits yells, and suddenly I realize where I am, taking my eyes off the pale goth, and staring at a clapping and cheering audience, blushing slightly, either at the applause, or at the intense proximity to that girl.

"That was awesome! I got chilly chills and it's not even winter! Great job astronauts"

Jade drops my hand forcefully, rolls her eyes and storms off the stage. "Yeah yeah whatever" she mumbles, taking a sit besides Beck, wrapping her arm around his, with the most bored look ever.

My stomach suddenly feels like it got punched.

I fake a smile, thank Sikowits and flop down in my seat, trying to calm down my hammering heart.

What the fuck was that?!


	4. Chapter 4

Lost.

That's the perfect word to describe my feelings today.

Lost.

But what did I loose?

My senses, perhaps.

Yeah, that sounds about right.

All of my senses and hell, even my brain got suddenly lost in thought, questioning my life from inside out. Not all of it. Just the part that involves a certain goth.

Why am I so caught up in this? Why do I care so much? Why the fuck did I feel my heart hammering so hard? Why do I feel so damn confused?

It was nothing.

It was everything.

A glint, a spark, that got me inside this hurricane.

What is that girl hiding?

All I can think about now is that pretty spark, shinning all over inside of me, irradiating heat from head to toe. She is so fucking gorgeous.

Why am I thinking those things?

Maybe I'm just worrying about her.

Yeah, that has to be it.

I saw something inside that girl. Pain, confusion. She's lost. She makes herself seem so strong, so powerful. But even heroes (or villains?) have their weakness.

Maybe the reason she affected me so much was the worry. The need to help. The need to comfort.

But she wouldn't let me. She would push me away.

The rest of the day for me was a blur. I couldn't focus in any class, even if I wanted to.

Lunch time came and I sat in our usual table.

She wasn't there.

Thank god.

"Hey Tor, what's up with you today?" Andre asks.

"Yeah babe, what got ya panties in a twist?" Rex adds.

I'm not in the mood to answer them, since I don't even know the answer myself.

So I just do what I do best.

"Oh nothing, just a stupid math test, I got a bad grade. But I'm fine, thanks for asking" I flash them the most convincing Tori smile I could master.

"Yeah I get you Tori. I got a D on that." Beck laments.

We keep on making small talk, as I try to focus on their voices.

But my head is someplace else.

And then I see that place making her way towards our table, marching angrily, with her usual frown, staring at the ground.

She sits besides Beck.

"Hey babe. Whats up?" Beck smiles at her lovingly.

It makes me wanna puke.

"Shut up and kiss me." She orders, not bothering to look at anyone at the table, but him.

He does as she says, and the sight of them making out makes my insides twist. Not in a pleasant way.

Am I jealous?

Weird. I don't think I like Beck that way.

They finish kissing and she turns her head towards me.

She catches my eye, and I see it again.

That light.

And I can't stop staring at it. At her.

I don't know how long we stay that way, eying each other.

Nobody seems to notice, as they chat and eat.

She holds my gaze for a few more seconds until she snaps out of it, again blocking the intense spark.

She grabs onto Beck, narrowing her eyes at me, and launches herself off the table, pulling him with her.

"Woah babe, what's-"

"Let's go. I can't stand those freaks today." Jade spats, taking a glance at me, specifying who her phrase was directed to.

And my gut gets punched again.

What the hell is wrong with me today?

Jade leaves, storming off the table, leaving the school with Beck.

Leaving me, a very hurt and confused Tori behind, and not once looking back.

* * *

Friday is going as shitty as the day before.

I'm confused, very, but I'm pretending to be ok. It's working.

I don't know what the heck is wrong with me.. I've never been like this before. Like a witch, this girl has caught me in her spell, making me wonder just about anything. I just want to know. Why does she hate me? Why does she act so mean towards everyone? Is she in pain and taking it out on everyone, on me? Why does that bother me so much? Why can't I stop thinking about it? About her.

I take out my books from my locker, distracted, and I feel someone behind me.

Somehow I know exactly who it is. I turn around.

Jade.

"Vega." She hisses angrily, glaring.

Her glare catches me off guard, as always, but I hold my ground, staring right back.

"Hello Jade, what's up" I force a huge smile, and she huffs angrily, narrowing her eyes in response.

Jade West hates my smiles, or any smile whatsoever.

"I should ask you the same question. What the hell has gotten into you lately?!" She mutters, frustrated and mad, but I can tell by the look in her eyes that she's almost.. genuinely curious?

I freeze a little, staring at the ground, faking confusion. Oh god she noticed I'm acting weird. Am I really that obvious?

"I- hm- I'm not sure I know what you mean- I-"

I mentally slap myself.

Pathetic. Oh god I'm pathetic, why am I gaging, oh lord I sound like an idiot. Now she's gonna know something is up.

But what is up? I don't really know either.

She rolls her eyes, takes a step closer. I advert my eyes towards her murdering glare and my heart races. If looks could kill I'd be dead already. She looks so pretty, like a pretty serial killer.

Wait, where did that thought come from?!

"Look, I don't know what's gotten into that empty head of yours, but keep staring at me and I'll rip your eyes out. Got it Vega? So fuck off" She points a finger at me, and suddenly she's out, storming off to class.

As she leaves I can finally breathe, regaining conscious.

She noticed I've been watching her. Oh shit. I didn't think it was that obvious, nor did I think it would bother her so much. Why does it bother her so much? Why am I staring anyway?

Oh god I need to get her off my mind.

As the day passes, I try to come up with an idea to get Jade off my system. But I can't think of anything.

I decide I should get advice from one of my best friends.

I find Andre in the music room, playing the piano.

"Hey Andre, hm, could you help me with something? I kinda need to talk to you." I ask, and he stops what he's doing, smiling at me.

"Sure thing girl, what do ya need? I was finished with this song here anyways."

Andre is such a loving, caring person. This is one of the moments I'm glad I have someone to open up to. So I do.

"Hm, well, as you probably noticed, something has been bothering me the past few days. I don't really know what it is, but it has to do with, uh, Jade."

He narrows her eyes. "What did she do? Is she being too ganky?"

"No, well, yeah, but that's beside the point. It's just- she's so frustrating you know?" He nods. "And at that Sikowit's class yesterday, I- I saw something in her eyes and- Oh god I sound stupid. It's just that I saw something, like a spark or something, threatening to crack you know. And, and it seems like she's hiding something deep, you know? And I don't know, it got me worried, cause maybe she's going through something bad, or confusing, and she's not telling anyone you know? And- I just wanna help her but today she told me to fuck off and stop staring at her, and I didn't even realize I have been staring and- you know? She's just so frustrating and- well now I can't stop thinking about it and I gotta help her but she won't let me, and god- maybe that's all in my head I'm going crazy and she doesn't need my help but- Oh god just, I need to get my mind off of this, but how-" I realize now I'm blabbing stupidly, and Andre is smiling hugely with a knowing look, laughing a little. That gets to me.

"Why are you laughing?! I- I'm being serious here!"

He chuckles. "Tori, hey, just relax. I think maybe you're just overreacting, over reading things you know? But if you're right, and she is confused or hiding something, than maybe you should really just back off a little and let her figure it out herself, you know? Just relax. She told you to stop staring cause it's probably making her uncomfortable, right? Just let her be. She's a strong girl and can take care of herself. Now you need to sit back and relax or something. You know, I just had a great idea girrl. Why don't we have a party? Invite the gang, have some beer, what do ya think? I hear Beck's off for the weekend, tomorrow, and Jade's probably coming with him, so it'll help get your mind off it. My grandma is visiting a friend, so, what do you say? My house, Saturday?"

I smile hugely. Andre is such a good friend. I nod. "Yeah, that sounds awesome. I think that's what I need. Thanks Andre, you're right, I should just back off a little and forget all this." I sigh. "Sooo, let's invite the others!" I grin, and he grins right back.


	5. Chapter 5

Turns out Andre's plans of it being a casual, small encounter didn't work out quite like that.

Apparently Cat invited everyone at school, thinking it was a full, blown party.

And my plans of forgetting the raven haired girl also went downhill.

Apparently Jade was not coming with Beck on the trip, cause Beck's parents hate her. Oh well.

So now, Saturday afternoon has come and I'm getting ready for a crazy party, knowing the goth will be there also.

Oh, fantastic!

I take a shower, wash my hair, dry it, style it just as I like it, straight and curled at edges.

I take hours to find the perfect clothes, settling with a light, short blue dress, that fits my body perfectly, putting on a yellow cardigan, finishing of with some pretty earrings and necklace.

I do my make up a little heavier than usual. Not too heavily, but not light either.

I look in the mirror, and smile. Damn. I look hot.

I grab my purse and check the time. It's a little early, but I decide to go anyway, urging Trina to get ready faster. Yeah, she's coming too, with the intent of flirting with all the cute boys there.

I find that flirting with cute boys does sound like a good idea.

After all, I need some sort of distraction.

We get to the party at seven, finding only Andre, Cat and Robbie there, placing tons of beer and vodka on the fridge.

"Hello chicas and Andre." Trina greets, and I chuckle a little.

"Hey! I'm not a girl!" Robbie complains.

"Tori, wow, you look hot!" Cat jumps up and down, hugging me. Everyone nods, and I blush a little.

"Hello everyone! And thanks Cat, you look hot too! Wow, that's a lot of alcohol!" I say, shocked as I see them open the fridge. There's all sort of stuff there. Whine, crazy amount of beer, vodka, tequila, a few cans of soda, including doctor pepper, my favorite. I make a mental note to hide one in the bottom of the fridge, saving it for later.

"Yeah well, apparently the whole school is coming, since someone invited everyone, isn't that right Cat?" Andre says, still a little mad with the redhead.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Never mind." Andre sighs, then smiles, as if deciding to suck it up and put it all aside. "Soo, since there's all sorts of drinks here, and we're here, why don't we start the party huh?!" Andre cheers, opening a can of beer.

We all cheer with him, and I grab one for myself.

I don't usually drink, but considering that everyone is going to be drinking, and that I have some things I want off my head, might as well join them.

We put on some music and sit on the living room, chatting and drinking.

Around nine people start showing up. Lots of them.

Sitting on the couch with Cat, I'm on my third beer, already getting a little overly excited. I also find myself giddy, looking at the door every time someone enters, as if I'm waiting for someone. Ok, who am I fooling? I'm obviously looking for Jade.

Maybe she won't come.

I find myself disappointed.

Do I want her to come?

Lost in thought, I don't notice Cat leaving, nor the girl of my thoughts entering the room. Only when she goes to the living room I'm in, I look up.

I wish I hadn't.

She's standing there, with her eyebrows raised a little, looking at me expectantly.

All the air is vanished from my lungs.

She looks beautiful.

She's wearing black boots and a black, tight dress that hugs her curves perfectly, making her boobs stand out. Oh shit I'm looking at her boobs. I advert my eyes to her face, and she raised her eyebrows even higher, kind of surprised I just checked her out.

I blush sightly, finally opening my mouth to say something, but she's faster then me.

"Vega, my eyes are up here, you know?" She smirks evilly, teasing me, and my blush deepens.

"I like your dress" I mutter, as if making na excuse for checking her out.

She rolls her eyes and snaps "can't say the same bout you. You look like sunshine and vomit."

Then she's out to the kitchen, and I'm left with a bad feeling in the pity of my stomach.

I shake it off. She probably just said that to annoy me. I look hot. Don't I?

Feeling a little insecure, I decide to drink a bit more, this time, Andre comes and offers me a drink.

I ask what it is, he just tells me to trust him.

I carefully take a sip, finding that it tastes awesome.

"Wow, that's good, a little strong on the vodka but awesome. What did you put in here?"

"Well, magicians shall never reveal their tricks" Andre winks, laughing, and I shrug and drink it anyway.

After a while the house's already full of people, the whole school maybe. I'm talking to Cat outside on the yard, already finishing the second drink Andre gave me. I feel a lot tipsier than before, and in a fantastic mood. Cat is just the same, and I find her funnier than usual.

There are people on the pool, other's on the yard doing tequila shots. And again I find myself looking for someone.

"Hey Cat, do you know where Jade is?" Just as Cat's about to answer, I feel a hand push me and Cat inside, to the living room. It's Robbie, a very drunk Robbie, yelling "TRUTH OR DARE!LET'S PLAY! HEY EVERYONE, WE'RE PLAYING TRUTH OR DARE HERE, COME ALONG IF YOU WANNA!"

I find myself joining a circle full of people, sitting next to Cat, who's overly excited to play, as always. There's probably around 20 people playing.

And as I inspect them, I see Andre in the circle talking to a pretty girl, Robbie talking to some weird dude, and then someone catches my eye.

Sitting in the circle, talking to some girl is Jade West.

Her checks are kinda flushed, and she's smiling a little. She looks drunk.

And her smile, even from distance, turns my insides into jelly. I can't help but smile at her.

As if noticing, her head snaps towards me, and her smile vanishes.

Air, where is it, I can't find it.

She again raises her eyebrows, studying me. I bite my lips as I see her eyes travel towards my hair, my clothes, my chest, my lips. Just as quickly as she started, she stopped, turning her attention back to the girl next to her, pretending I'm not even here.

I'm left with a blush, huffing madly, waiting for the game to start.

They start doing lots of freaky dares, and some ugly truths. It starts getting kinda naughty, as some dares were of people are making out, tit groping, or taking away some piece of clothing.

My turn comes, and a weird unknown dude asks me "Truth or dare"

I open my mouth to speak, but someone interrupts.

"Like we all don't know she's gonna ask for truth. Too much of a chicken to do dares" Jade challenges me, smirking.

I feel myself get worked up. Checks flushed, mad or embarrassed, I snap back "well then you know nothing of me West. I'll take the dare." I challenge her back, smirking at her. She raises her eyebrows, seeming impressed.

"Make out with that redhead next to ya." The drunk guy dares, and everyone cheers, with the exception of me, Cat, and the goth.

"Cool! I've always wanted to kiss a girl! And Tori's so pretty" Cat grins, surprising everyone in the circle. Even Jade.

A little overwhelmed with the challenge, I'm about to say something, but as I stare at Jade, I don't.

She smirks at me like she knows I won't do it.

Well, might as well prove her wrong.

I smirk back hugely, and with a swift, bold move I grab Cat by the back of her head, locking lips with her.

She squirms a little but kisses back.

Her lips taste like flowers and cupcakes. Is that even possible?

I find it surprisingly nice.

As I start getting into it, I grab her by the waist, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss.

Our tongues battle, and I win. I bite her lip, and hear her moan I little in my mouth in response. It again, surprisingly, turns me on.

She pulls me even closer, as one of my hands find her hair, pulling on it.

I hear cheering behind us, snaping me out of it, so I pull back, a blush coloring my face.

Cat looks a little dazed too, and with a drunk grin says "Wow, that was awesome. Tori you're such a good kisser!" She giggles and my blush deepens, since everyone around us look blown away.

I smirk as my eyes find Jade's. She's wearing na unreadable expression. But her eyes say otherwise.

Her eyes are burning up. Almost like she's.. Jealous?

Oh, no that can't be. It doesn't make sense at all.

Maybe she's just mad cause I proved a point. That I'm not the coward she thinks I am. I did the dare.

As the game goes on, I find myself questioning.

Cat's kiss was just as nice as kissing boys. Just softer and sweater. It was very pleasant.

Did I enjoy it cause I'm drunk or do I-

Nah.

I don't like girls that way.

It was just a thing of the moment.

I- I'm not gay, or bi, or whatever.

Cat's just a really good kisser. Yeah, that's it.

But that still doesn't explain why I felt.. Turned on..

I snap out of my thoughts, only to find Jade not there anymore.

Where did she go?

"Heyoooo, Torey, tequila shotsss! C'mon it's your turn!" Robbie yells, handing the bottle to me, along with the salt and lemon.

I gladly accept the shot, feeling the alcohol burn my throat, and stomach.

After that shot, I find myself officially sorta drunk.

Andre pulls me to the 'dance floor' and I happily follow, dancing with him.

I see Jade making her way to the dance floor, a blurry, pretty mess of girl.

Not giving a shit, I smile and approach her, heart racing, blood boiling. But still not giving a shit.

She sees me, rolling her eyes, but her lips threaten to form a small smile, wich makes mine bigger.

"You look stupid when you're drunk" She says loudly, and now I'm the one rolling my eyes.

"Well, if by stupid you mean hot, I guess I do miss. And you look like the devil's pretty wife." Feeling less nervous and bolder, I smile and wink, swaying my hips with the beat of the song, knowing she's watching.

She looks surprised with my answer. She clears her throat and return with her oh so Jade like glare. "No. I really meant stupid." She snaps, taking a beer I didn't know I was holding, from my hand.

"Hey! That's mine!" I whine, pouting a little.

As she takes a sip, I see her bite her lip a little.

That's a nice lip. Very nice. Maybe I could-

Whoa. What. No Tori. Don't go there.

"This tastes like piss and puke. Just like your outfit." She mumbles, hands it over to me and storms off.

Okaaay, that was a weirrrrd comparison. How can she taste my outfit?

She must me drunker than me now.

I decide I should take a small break from the alcohol, just dancing my frustrations away.

Or dancing Jade away.

I just hope she'll come back soon.


	6. Chapter 6

Lots of time has passed, and I feel a little less drunk, but still very.

I remember the soda I hid before in the fridge, grin hugelly and make my way towards the kitchen to grab it.

I catch my breath when I find I'm not alone in the kitchen.

And the devil's here.

I try my best to ignore her presence, opening the frigde to search for my much needed prize.

Just to find it isn't there.

I snap my head towards Jade "Have you seen my doctor pepper?" I ask, dumbly.

"You mean this one?" the drunk Jade inquires, showing off the can of soda in her hand, flashing her signature smirk.

I look at her angrily, not in the mood to deal with her stealing my stuff again. Not my doctor pepper. Not her. Not when she makes my head spin even more than the alcohol.

Her smirk deepens, setting off something inside me, anger, maybe. "Jade, give it to me! It's the last one!" I say, stubornly, faltering a little bit, because of the buzz, or her, I don't know. Too drunk.

"Well, finder's keeper's. Sorry Vega. Wait, not really." She smirks again, this time opening the can and taking a sip, eyeing me in the process.

That's enough to set me off. If she wasn't so damn bitchy I would perhaps let her have it. But it's too late to back down now, not when adrenaline is pumping through my veins. I take a step towards her, trying to take it from her hand, forcing her to take a step away, her back hiting the kitchen counter at the process. I take yet another step foward, she holds the soda up and I try to reach out to it.

What I don't realize, in my adrenaline, alcohol/Jade induced haze, is that, during our silly game, our bodies got pressed up against each other.

Shocked, I freeze when I notice, and she does too.

My heart does, too.

Being nearly the same height, we're face to face, our stomachs, chests and tights pressed together, one of my arms gripping the kitchen counter lightly, the other, with a firm grip on her upper arm.

And I'm burning all over.

Like a thousand bricks smashing right into my head, I feel all air being knocked out of me.

I can't breathe.

I hear her take in a deep breath. Feeling her chest rising and falling, right against mine. Her eyes closed, full lips parted enticingly.

And it strikes me to my very core, fire spreading lower in my stomach than it should, making me gasp for air a little.

But the feeling is everywhere. From my stomach, to my chest, to my throat, it spreads.

It's so hot in here.

It feels so right, her body and mine, it seems to fit.

Her breathing sounds like music to my drunk ears.

It's so hot I feel like I'm melting.

Floating.

It doesn't seem real.

Maybe because it's way too real.

I look right into her eyes, now open. We're so close. They are so beautiful. Greenish blue orbs, dancing around beneath her eyelids, shining that spark I became so familiar with.

Oh god, she's so close. I can smell her. It smells like mint, black roses, coffee and a bit of vodka. It smells like Jade.

And I'm intoxicated. Her smell invades my senses, making my insides squirm, my heart quicken, and my head spin.

Someone in the yard turns off the lights outside.

Her face now shining as the moonlight gently carresses her body.

She's stunning.

The urge to close the distance between us is now unberable.

Like reading my mind, she inches even closer, our faces only an inch away from each other.

I feel my heart, threatning to jump out of my chest, so strong, so alive, it makes me tremble.

Her eyes.

That spark, that fire as she looks into mine, searching for something.

I'm lost.

Suddenly I see myself falling inside a deep hole, one that sucks everything out of my soul.

I can only breathe her.

Her hair, her lips, her eyes;

I fall inside them and get lost in this land of lust.

I lost this battle long ago.

I don't even know how much time has passed, two minutes or ten seconds, it doesn't matter.

Why?

Cause I'm drunker than ever.

But not just on alcohol.

I'm drunk on Jade West.

And finnally, realization strikes me like a ton of bricks.

I've always known Jade West could steal things.

But I never knew she would steal my heart too.

Maybe I do like girls.

Maybe I just like Jade.

What I didn't know then, was how my life would be turned upside down.

I didn't know I was stepping into a hurricane.

I didn't know I was entering a deep, dark hole that would suck every once of my being.

I didn't know.

If only I knew back then I would-

I would do it all over again.


	7. Chapter 7

It's a funny thing, you know?

How easily you can fall from a bridge.

How easily your life turns into a mess.

How easily a dream becomes a nightmare.

Sometimes, it just becomes reality.

And I knew, from that moment, that I would never be the same.

I would loose myself trying to find her.

As I was standing, in a dreamy bubble, feeling like heaven, I should have known.

It always turns into hell.

I suddenly felt a cold liquid splashing over my head.

I realized where I was. Lips inches away from touching hers, inches away from tasting heaven.

I tasted doctor pepper instead.

I pull away, feeling colder than ever, not from the drink she just spilled over my head.

My heart froze entirely.

I gasp, in shock, sad shock, or a mad disappointment, I'm not sure.

She smirks. But somehow I can see right through it. It's fake.

It's like she turned into this evil doll again, made entirelly from plastic.

But she can't fool me now. Cause I've seen the real thing.

I saw the flesh and I felt it. I felt her breathing against me, her eyes shutting and lips trembling.

Was it all fake?

Was she just hoping to seduce me so she could pull on some prank?

Fuck her.

Yeah. I just swore.

"Tastes good?" Jade teases, smirking and raising na eyebrow.

I huff in anger and sadness, staring right back into her eyes, waiting for something. Hoping that maybe the sweet, soft girl I just met seconds ago, was still there.

But I saw only a deep void inside her eyes. All signs of regret were gone. They were never there.

"What the fuck Vega. I'm not your little lesbo drunk experiment toy. Don't come near me ever again. Got it, Vega? Is it so hard to get into that shitty brain of yours that I don't give a fuck about you? Huh? What? You thought I was gonna like, kiss you? I don't give a shit bout your needy ass, got it? You are discusting. Now get the fuck out of my way."

And with a glare, she stormed off.

And my heart fell to the ground, smashed into tiny little broken pieces.

She's making me turn into glass.

Fragile fragments, pulled togheter by a weak force.

And she got that glass now. It's on her hands, to make it or break it.

She's got my heart over her palms.

And I'm left with nothing but a wet head.

So I walk to the nearest bathroom to clean up, washing her away from me, taking off her smell.

But it's still there. The memory. It still feels like she's right against me, making me gasp for air.

Good, when did I turn into such a melodramatic, depressing, head over heals freak.

It's a funny thing, you know?

Okay, maybe it's just sad.

I'm in love with my enemy.

And she is a girl.

And she hates my guts.

I'm officially screwed.

Not in the good way.

* * *

"C'mon guys! Let's partaay!"

Okay. That was a drunk Robbie. Preety wasted. Oh, what time is it?

I look around, I'm laying on the floor, with a dude. Who is this dude anyway? I can't remember his name. But I think I was just kissing him. Whoa, I'm so drunk it's all blurry.

Oh, nope. He's leaning in right now. I don't wanna kiss him. Bleargh. He smells weird. Jade smells like flowers. I want Jade. And flowers. Maybe Jade could bring me some flowers. Kiss flavoured. Hm, yeah. Jade flavored flowers.

I try to kind of push the dude away, but I stumble.

Suddenly I see the dude laying on the floor, kinda like he's hurt. Wait.

Did someone just punch him?

Oh.

Jade.

I see Jade.

My heart jumps up.

She's grabing my arm and pulling me with her.

Her hands on me. That's some soft hands.

"Heyo, where we going?" I ask.

She looks at me weird. Like she's mad or something. Why is she mad at me?

What time is it?

Oh, right. The party. I'm at the party.

"Just shut up Tori and move your ass." She tells me, and keeps pulling me with her.

She's not so drunk is she? Oh shit and I'm wasted.

Do I look okay?

She's so pretty.

"But my ass not as nice as yours" I pout.

She looks at me like I just grew na extra head, huffs angrily.

Suddenly I see we are outside. We're not at the party anymore.

"Why are we not at the party Jadeee? Where you taking me?"

Then she stops, lets go of my arm and glares at me.

Wow. We are close.

It's late.

The moon. On her hair. Green black and blue. Her eyes. Looking at me. She's so fucking gorgeous. I wanna swim in her eyes. She's like art. And so close. Her smell invades my senses again. And god, I wanna kiss her.

I wish she would kiss me.

Should I kiss her?

"Tori. I'm taking you home. No objections. You are going home now. You can't even walk without help. Jesus. You know that guy was nearly fucking you there don't you? And what the hell did you drink? I'm not a babysitter ya know? Fuck. Fucking asshole. Well at least now he's got a broken nose." She sighs, again eyeing me in a weird, mad way.

She's so beautiful.

Wait. Did she just say she broke his nose?

"Whoa. You broke his nose? That's bold." I chuckle lightly, and she rolls her eyes. But I can see the corner of her lips lift up a little. Haa. Jade wants to smile. I want her to smile. Her smile is sooooo pretty.

"Let's go."

She grabs my arm again, and that pleasant feeling comes back. Soooo soft hands. Hm. I wish she would touch me everywhere.

She opens the door and tells me to get in.

I pout, but do as she says, not without nearly falling.

Right into her arms.

She holds me by my hips, steading my trembling body.

Her hands on me set me on fire.

And I see it when I look into her eyes. She's pure gold, her orbs shining more than the moonlight behind her. And I can't help but smile, cause it's so pretty. She's so pretty.

Then yet again she blocks the spark, glaring at me and looking away, without letting go of me though.

"J-just get in the damn car Vega."

I sigh and nod, now succedding in entering her car, feeling kinda empty without her hands on me.

She enters as well, tells me to put on my seatbelt, and I do, eyeing her.

She drives.

I say nothing, too mesmerized by her. The profile of her face is amazing.

I can't believe I just now noticed how truly beautiful she is.

I can't not stare at her.

I feel like I just found this huge elephant in the room and now I can't unsee it. It's everywhere. She's everywhere.

She just looks at the road, but sensing my eyes on her, she turns a little, catching my gaze.

I have the sudden urge to do something.

Tell her how beautiful she is, kiss her, hold her tight against me, smell her hair, oh God.

She takes a deep breath and looks away.

Does she feel it too?

"What are you looking at?" She mutters angrily, eyes on the road.

"You." I say, strughing, not in the mood to lie.

She rolls her eyes.

"Well knock it off already."

So I do, suddenly feeling a little sleepy, my eyes closing a little.

"Vega, wake up! We are at your place, get out already."

Confused, I open my eyes slowly, and see Jade, shaking my shoulder. Her hand on me. Oh shit. Her eyes on me. She raises an eyebrow. I remember she gave me a ride. I'm home. Drunk. Jade's car. Jade. Jade. Fuck. Jade.

"So? You gonna stand there like a fucking idiot or ya gonna get out of my car?"

She takes her hand off my shoulder, the spark there fading, and I feel a little colder.

"Uh sure. I'm going." I open the door and get out, only to stumble and nearly trip over my feet.

Shit my head still spinning.

Jade.

Beside me, hands on my waist, holding me up.

"Fuck Vega, you can't even walk. You know you shouldn't drink like that again like ever." She swears, pulling me towards her, our bodies pressed together as she pulls me towards my house.

Everyone is sleeping, I guess, as we enter.

She doesn't look at me the whole way up my room, staring at the floor.

I'm burning up, everywhere. Her bodie fits perfectly against mine. I feel warm all over and my heart races.

Once we get to my room she stops and eyes me.

She isn't letting go of me.

I don't want her to.

I gasp a little for air, and she shuts her eyes at the sound, letting go of me all of a sudden, like I was fire and she just got burned.

I feel empty.

"Well I'm gonna-" She says, staring at the ground again, and suddenly she's out of there, in a blink of na eye, vanishes from my room and from me.

I feel giant void consume me as I lie on my bed.

Before falling asleep all I can think off is

Oh boy am I screwed.


End file.
